Christmas Memories

Christmas Tree by Anna Cervova

“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas…” Except there’s no snow and no reindeer and no Yule log on the fire.  But lest I sound discouraging, it is cold and I have the excuse to wear my favorite (translation: ugly) fuzzy sweater and even fuzzier socks. Seriously though, Christmas is one of my favorite times of the year.

Yesterday I began pulling out the Christmas decorations. There is a memory attached to every item that I pull out of the boxes. The nativity set that I bought years ago still has all of its pieces. I have managed to save baby Jesus from the dogs at least three times over the years.

There are Hallmark mice ornaments given to me by my mom, some of the few things that I have from her. Hand painted snowmen that I bought at a craft fair while shopping with a friend. Star garland made of grapevine that I bought for my first Christmas tree after my divorce. There is a basket full of Christmas cards that I received last year.  I hope that I mailed the senders cards. At the bottom of the box is a tangle lights that I may find the courage to sort out.

Each year it seems like such a chore to pull out all the decorations and distribute them throughout the house. There have been years that I have dwelled on the future chore of taking down the décor. But this year, I’m looking forward to decking the halls and surrounding myself with memories of Christmas past.

The Power of Procrastination

Creative Daydreaming by Frits Ahlefeldt

Creative Daydreaming by Frits Ahlefeldt

Procrastination. I love it!  Without procrastination, how could I possibly enjoy things like watching the director’s commentary on a movie that I just watched… for the third time? Or, playing hangman on the computer. 

Or, my favorite… lurking on Facebook.

Everyone knows that Facebook is, by far, the best tool for procrastination. Where else can you catch up with friends, do research, play games and do professional networking. But, I digress.

I’m supposed to be writing the great American novel. I meet with one of my writer friends every Saturday at a great coffee shop. The shop is wonderful because they let us move in, move furniture around and drink copious amounts of coffee for endless hours and while they may begin to wonder if we have homes, they never kick us out.  Which is a good thing, because it gives me plenty of time for my favorite procrastination pastime: Facebook Scavenger Hunt.

Here’s how the game is played. Go to your friend list. Click on the third friend (or fifth or tenth or whatever toots your horn). When you get to their page, click their third friend. Keep going until you get to someone you don’t know.

This is when the game can get really fun. You now have two options. First, you can merely be a common Facebook lurker and read all about the interesting friend of a friend that you just met. Or, you can be brave and introduce yourself.  Meeting new friends is a great way to entertain yourself instead of writing!

Now, does playing Facebook Scavenger Hunt improve my odds of finishing my book?  I’m not so sure. But when you read it, you may recognize some of the characters.  Oh, and by the way… names have been changed to protect the innocent. 

Now, back to procrastinating.

The Power of the Edge

Photo by www.openphoto.net

Sometimes in life the unexpected happens. Like a highway line drawn on a map, the life path meanders along twisting and turning across the map until it runs right up to the edge. It is at the edge where we find the unexpected. We expect the twists and turns along the way. We know that there will be times that we will have to struggle up hills and times when we will coast down the other side. But as we come up to the edge of the map, uncertainty hits us. At this point, when we have reached the edge, when we no longer know what the next step is, that is precisely when we have to make a choice.

Do nothing.

We can make the decision to just sit out. Sitting out reduces the level of risk, nearly eliminating the chance of something unpleasant happening. But, we also run the risk of missing out on something wonderful.

Turn back.

Reaching the end of the line can be a frightening experience.  Rather than trying to find out what is up ahead, turning around and retracing our steps may seem like a safe plan, even if it means returning to past hurts. Sometimes a past hurt feels safer than the unknown. Sometimes it is safer.

Keep moving forward.

Choosing to keep moving forward may be the scariest option of all, but has the potential to produce the greatest opportunities. Taking a chance and risking stepping off the edge of the map into the unknown is a daunting experience. While moving forward can be risky, it can reveal a whole new world of possibilities.

All of these choices are truly valid responses to the unknown. But sometimes, taking the risk and moving forward into the unknown, having faith in possibility of joy, is the right decision. So, when you find yourself at the edge of the map, what will you do?

A Taste of Fall...

Autumn Leaf by Petr Kratochvil 

The last two days have been a little taste of fall... cool air, a drizzle of rain.  It has sent me scurrying for an extra blanket, a sweatshirt and even turning on the space heater. 


It kind of gives me mixed feelings. I love fall, but it reminds me that our monsoon season is just around the corner. In about three months I will be like everyone else in the Pacific Northwest, whining about the endless rain that lasts from November until March. Right now it's easy to remember that all the rain last winter was the provider of all the beautiful green that I enjoyed all spring and summer. But I know that by January, the lush green and warmth of summer will be a distant memory. 


So, while I curl up on my couch with my favorite old afghan and a cup of coffee to write I am reminded to enjoy the last vestiges of summer, to store up warm memories to hold onto in the cold and dark of winter.

The Power of Perspective

I spent an hour and a half yesterday battling Mother Nature’s invasion of my backyard. Truly, it was all I could manage.

This is not an ordinary battle against the lowly dandelion. Tough they are there with their pesky sunny yellow heads that without warning erupt into a cascade of white fluffy seeds that spread throughout the yard, landing like invading paratroopers. Even in their persistence, they are not a truly worthy opponent.

I gloved up and put on my armor, the inglorious sweatshirt and sweatpants. Wielding my trusty pruners, I headed into battle.

Now those who live in the city or even the suburbs might think that I’m being overly dramatic. And while I have been accused of that in the past, I assure you that I am completely on the up and up here.

I live in the toolies, in the boondocks, in the middle of nowhere. At the back, my yard butts up to hundreds of acres of farmland. From my deck, I can see yellow squash blooms among squash leaves the size of steering wheels. I can also see acres of corn stretching ever upward in the August sunshine. To the right is a small strip of woods with pine, cedar, pussywillow, holly and apple trees. To the left is one of the few neighbors on the gravel lane that leads to my house.

It is the woods that are the problem. Amongst the beautiful trees in my woods is one of nature’s most persistent plants:  the blackberry briar. They drive me to distraction. The moment I look away, here they come pushing through the woods trying to take over. Long arms push up and over the shrubs and through the trees into my yard, threatening a hostile take over.  And so I enter the fray.

An hour and a half into my battle, I stand back and look at the 15 feet that I had managed to clear. Scratched and bleeding from the unrelenting thorns that tore through my sweats and gloves, I hauled three garbage cans worth of yard debris to the fire pit in the middle of the yard. Only to remember, I cannot burn it. I will get to look at the mountain of debris out my kitchen window every day as I wash dishes, until burning season.

Standing there in the middle of my overgrown grass, frustrated beyond belief, standing next to a mountain of yard debris, surrounded by more invasive weeds than the state’s extension service can track, I see it. A purple thistle about two feet tall has sprung up on the side of the yard. It is almost too much to bear.

I stare into the purple fluff of the thistle trying to determine if my gloves will protect me in my attempt to destroy yet another villainous weed. 

Suddenly I am aware of the beautiful purple of the thistle flower. And for a moment, my overgrown, weed-infested yard is simply a grassy meadow filled with wildflowers. 


And with that new perspective, I go into the house and pour myself a glass of lemonade.

The Power of Connection

On Tuesday I sat by a woman at a community training meeting. And I listened.

We were asked to share a current personal struggle with the person at the table next to us. The rules were simple. Listen. Don't try to fix. For those of you who know me well, fixing is what I do.

As I sat with her and listened to her share the challenges that she was facing as she was transitioning from a strong, vital working woman to a retiree with health concerns I was transfixed.

Before me sat a beautiful, strong, compassionate woman.  In my eyes, she seemed to have it all together.  Yet, she shared with me that at sixty-two she was facing a crisis. She was struggling to redefine her role, to find her way on the path that lay before her. The impending changes in her life had brought fear and anxiety with them.

In that moment we were connected. I sat with her and saw myself reflected in her story. Like her, my life is on the cusp of a major transition. The engines have started, the motor is revving and I am itching to take my foot off the brakes and race forward into the future. Yet, with all the excitement for the things to come, there is also a cloud of uncertainty.

I do not fully know what the future holds. I know my dreams and my hopes and my aspirations, but I do not know how they will be manifested.  But I am at peace, knowing that I am connected to those around me.

The Power of Freedom

Today is Memorial Day. A day that we remember and honor our veterans and those who went before us. Today we pause in rememberance. We take a moment out of our busy lives to consider the sacrifice that others have made for our freedom.

Freedom is one of the five basic needs that all people have. The freedoms we have in the United States were granted us by the sacrifices of others. We can freely worship, express ourselves, and be creative. These gifts cannot be taken lightly.

As I write these words today, I think about friends and family who have served as well as the many men and women whose names and faces I will never know. Thank you for your gift of sacrifice so that I might have the gift of freedom.

The Power of Attitude: Jessica's "Daily Affirmation"

Many of you may have already seen this adorable video clip circulating on UTube and Facebook. Yes, she is adorable. Yes, she is precocious. Yes, little Jessica has an amazing amount of energy, but more importantly she has a positive attitude about her own life.


How do we as adults recapture that youthful exuberance, that infectious joy and zest for life?

Happiness is a choice. Each day, just as you put on your socks and shoes before leaving the house, you also choose what attitude you will be wearing that day. Choosing a positive attitude can be difficult at times, especially when life is not going as smoothly as planned. Creating an attitude of happiness takes some work. Here are three easy ways to begin your own attitude adjustment:

1.  Surround yourself with happy people.  Attitude is contagious. If you are surrounding yourself with negativity, it will be difficult to maintain a positive attitude.

2.  Spend some time every day doing something that feeds your spirit.  When you fill your life with things that uplift your spirit happiness is sure to follow. Take time to pray, to paint, to read, to walk, to dance, to sing, to relax in a bubble bath, to garden. It doesn't matter what the activity is, so long as it is enjoyable for you.

3. Learn to say "No". There is always so much that needs to be done. There are so many good causes in the world that need help. But, when you fill your schedule to overflowing life becomes stressful. Practice say no to offers to help when you don't have the time.  Look over your current schedule and see if there is anything that you can eliminate or delegate from your schedule. Free up some time for you to be able to breathe.

Begin cultivating your attitude of happiness and like Jessica soon you will be able to look in the mirror and say "I love my life".

The Power of Now

Path In The Forest by Petr Kratochvil

While reading my horoscope this morning, or I affectionately call it, my "horror-scope" I came to the last line:

Concentrate on the power of now.

What a wonderful reminder about the importance of living in the present moment. Right now. Being present and being mindful of where I am. It's so easy to get caught up in the swirling rush of the to-do list. Or, in my case, the to-do LISTS. 

I have things to do around the house, at work, in the community, for my neighbors, in the yard, and so on and so on. If I put everything from washing the dishes to getting the oil changed in the car to attending a committee meeting down on paper, there would probably be over one hundred items on the list. 

It's just too overwhelming to think about.

And when it becomes too overwhelming, I go back to my life's motto:  "Life is an amazing journey and I will live it to the fullest".  Part of living life to the fullest is living in the moment. 

Life is not about the destination. Living life is about the journey and the sights and scenery along the way.

When I am focused on everything that went wrong yesterday or the mountain of tasks I need to complete tomorrow, I have lost sight of today. I have lost sight of now. I have lost sight of the very things that bring my joy: the sun shining through my window in the morning, the flowers blooming in my garden, the beautiful vegetables piled high at the farmer's market, the comfort of a warm quilt while I'm curled up on the couch, the love and laughter of friends and family.

Tonight, I pause on my life's journey. I take a deep breath and slowly release it as I take in the beauty of now.

The Power of Being Busy

Have you ever noticed how there is a fine line between being too busy and not busy enough?  That's my life.  If I'm too busy I feel stressed and run around like the proverbial "chicken with it's head cut off" and don't quite get everything done, which leads to more stress. 

And then there are days like today. I only had two meetings scheduled. One would think that that would be wonderful.  An entire workday with lots of open time to make phone calls, to return emails, to complete the mountain of paperwork that has been slowly moving across my desk like a massive Hawaiian lava flow.

But, no. Today I managed to sort through some of the accumulated papers and resort them into tidy stacks lined up across my desk like soldiers waiting for their marching orders.

Several months ago I read Crazy Busy: Overstretched, Overbooked, and About to Snap! by Edward M. Hallowell, M.D. who likened the busyness of people today to ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). We fill our time with television, cell phones, texting, emailing, surfing the net and continually attempt to multi-task nearly making ourselves crazy in the process. Then when we have the opportunity to slow down and take care of business in an orderly fashion, we crash and burn. 

Like me, today.  I had so much time on my hands, so few interruptions that I didn't know what to do.  I had nothing propelling me forward, nothing keeping me moving. It was like falling into a pit of mud.

So, where is the happy medium?

I propose that the happy medium is....  wait, I've got this.... somewhere in the middle!  Somewhere between completely overloaded and nothing. That spot where we are just busy enough to keep moving on our journey, but not too busy to enjoy the scenery.

So, my challenge for you and for myself is to figure out how to find that magical place, that utopia that lies there waiting for us.

The Power of Creativity

I always wished that I wasn't a product of the dysfunction that I grew up with. I looked at the other girls at school and longed to be them. You know the ones. They had beautifully styled hair, smoothed back in sleek ponytails, perfectly pressed dresses and the latest shoes. I'd stand near them in line at lunch or sit at the table next to them in the library and listen to them talk about the best brand of jeans to have, where their family was going on vacation, and where they went shopping over the weekend.

In my family, the closest thing we ever had to a vacation was packing up all our belongings that would fit into a U-Haul truck and driving cross country to the next military base. Shopping trips happened only three or four times a year and except for underwear, socks, and shoes which were bought at K-mart, shopping happened at thrift stores like New to You, Goodwill, or St. Vincent de Paul.

I longed to fit in, to have the same stylish clothing that my classmates had. So, as I eavesdropped on their conversations I would memorize the names of the brands and the stores that they shopped at. I would pour through the pages of magazines like Seventeen and Young Miss at the local library imprinting my brain with images of details and flourishes on the latest and hottest fashions for teens.

At the age of twelve, a determined thriftstore shopper was born. I would scour the stores for labels that matched those of my classmates. I would search for details that mimicked the details I saw in magazines. I would dig through the 69-cent bin for items that I could make over to reflect what I saw in the fashion magazines. I would take my treasures home, thankful that my grandmother had taught me to sew and I would hem, change buttons, add ribbons, whatever it took to recreate the images I saw in my classes and in the pages of fashion magazines. Creativity had become my salvation.